This was the week everyone had been waiting for all summer. 20’s, 30’s, 40’s and even some 50 year old’s dusted off the old hockey bag, sharpened their blades, taped their twig and packed a cooler full of delicious Labatt Blue. Monday Night Lights hockey league kicked off their fourth year in traditional fashion with a tilt between the Nordiques and North Stars. It proved to be a penalty filled game with eight minor penalties called, setting a new MNL record for most time spent in the sin bin in a game. The usual suspects led the way in scoring. The Diques had tallies from Pete (2), Kimmel, Gio and super sub Sugar. The North Stars were led by their top two picks “He Suits, He Scores” and Judge. In the end, the flying Otto brothers could not galvanize their troops for a comeback. Sources inside the North Stars locker room stated that “Troy has already booked Tony Robbins to come and motivate us, because his his bitching doesn’t work!”.
The second game of the night involved the pre-season favorite Whalers versus the Ducks. The sold out crowd at Viking Ice Arena expected a good old fashion blow out but were excited to witness a very good hockey game. The Whale jumped out to an early lead, scoring on the first shift. Jim Weaver banged in a lose puck on the goal mouth after the yeomans work was done by Serda and DaveP. “Eye’s juss doin’ my job” said Vape post game on the Labatt Blue Party Deck sponsored by OFP. The Ducks took the lead with two goals by Turtle Tim and Sugar Shawn Hardy. The second stanza ended with a 2-2 tie after Serda scored a beauty. The contest ended as a draw and that set up the most exciting event of the night… Bender Overtime! Both teams went back and forth with a fevered pace resulting in several scoring opportunities from both clubs. Pearcy could have ended it but hit the post and Jumpin’ Jim Ellis was stonewalled by Clawz. It came down to a shoot out. The Ducks went first and sent their most prolific scorer Sugar over the boards. He strode in on Clauser but was denied on his wrister. The game would be decided moments later by Peso. The Whaler bench flooded the ice to join Peso in his exuberant celly which lasted a full three minutes. “I think the fucker rode his stick the full length of the ice” commented Vinande.
Simultaneously on the NHL sheet, the Seals played the Americans. The league was introduced to it’s newest super star Pfister. He had an epic first period scoring three times and added an apple. Linemate ShaunE loved playing a long side of him… “I’m really impressed with his tenacity and skill level but even more impressive is Uncle Pfister. The dude is awesome!”. Adding to the excitement was the return of the General after living in semi-seclusion in northern Quebec ever since the unfortunate Denny Pratt tragedy. McCracken snipped upon his return along with Rattler and ShaunE. The game was a lopsided affair with a 6-2 victory for the surging Seals. The MVP of the night goes to freshman tendie Dylan Lesner who supplied the league with Pink Whitneys courtesy of Bar Stool Sports.
Can’t wait until next week…
Dickie Dunn
