Byline: Toronto, Ontario Preparing for the 2018/19 MNL Draft is comparably to studying for a trigonometry exam. Team GM’s and scouting personnel are spending days and hours breaking down prospective players. Teams look to balance speed, size, ability, leadership and skill to form their respective clubs for the season. Nordiques GM
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Diques Win! Set to Draft #1
Byline: Panty's Backyard The Nordiques have won something... The number one pick in the upcoming 2018/19 MNL Draft. The lucky ping pong ball was selected randomly out of @pantydropper hat in the scorching Berkley sun. "With the #1 selection in the draft...the Nordiques" exclaimed Associate Director of Central Scouting @suokas as
Cubes Substitute Splenda Serda for Sugar
Goalies: A Legal Nightmare
Last night, League Manager Jeremy Drager, Esq. subpoenaed CLAWZ PAWZ GM Cameron Clauser after failing to show to 5 consecutive court hearings. League Judge Andy Dragovic has enacted Habeas Corpus, demanding that Clauser appear to speak to his crimes of reassembling the Diques for a third time. Clauser is believed
6th Seal of the Tyepocalypse Nearly Broken
Religious leaders around the world held their collective breaths Monday night when Troy Otto nearly completed his first career hat trick against the the Wheeling Taylors. The Troy Hat Trick is one of two remaining unbroken seals of the Tyepocalypse (the only other being the North Stars winning a playoff
MNL to Issue Edict to Wheeling Taylors Forward Dave Cipparone to Stop Stripping Before Games
After his second incident of the 2018 Spring Season, the MNL will issue a "cease and don't strip" edict to Taylors Forward Dave Cipps. MNL deputy commissioner Jeremy Drager told MNLHN via email that the league will inform the Taylors that Cipparone must stop stripping during warmups. "Yes, we will be
Sugar Cubes Dissect CLAWZ PAWZ, Win 9-3
Clockgate Adds Asterisk to Shugacube Victory
Fans were rioting in Hazel Park Monday night after the curfew clock went off with 2:30 left in regulation. The score was 1-1 and the zamboni driver immediately opened the doors to the ice. Shuga, the Shugacube's GM, verbally acknowledged that a shootout would be an acceptable way to end
Nailers Nab Second Rounder
Byline: Viking Arena Parking Lot Wheeling Taylors GM @dslackerone Cipps and Clawz Pawz consummated a landmark trade last night after a long negotiation process. The deal sends venerable MNL veteran @Peso to the Mighty Nailers in exchange for steady defenseman @dougefresh . The trade came as a surprise to the league
Donald S. Cherry Paulinski Sits Down With Ron McDrager
Airing last night during the first intermission of the game between Winnipeg and the Wild, Coach's Corner featured an interview with Chad and Panty. The discussions revolved around players in the Lil Makushita stable and possible trade destinations. @chad_paulinski intimated that multiple players under his representation have been linked to
