Fans were furious Monday when they discovered the lovable Ducks would not be playing in the 9pm time slot. Instead, North Stars GM and amateur weightlifter Troy "The Swole One" Otto unilaterally decided to postpone the Ducks matchup for fear of losing his winning streak. Troy called up the Nordiques
Author: Charles Machi
Troy Otto’s Defensive Prowess Turns Heads
Goalie turned defenseman Troy "The Successful One" Otto had a shutdown game on defense Monday evening for the Mighty Ducks. Troy was able to play 40 minutes of a 45 minute game and allowed 0 goals against during that time. It was only after Troy had finished his final shift
Cipparone Found Culpable in Nordique Massacre
Citizens looked on in horror on Monday night as a washed up Junior Hockey Player lit up the MNL Nordiques. "Pistol" Pete Niphoratos earned a hat-trick against the struggling team, and even mentioned he could have scored more if he wasn't trying to feed his teammates. The Nordiques tried to
NosTroyDamus: “Bold” Predictions Inspire Fear Amongst the Ignorant
Panic and Awe has gripped the MNL Community after several predictions made by Troy "Nostroydamus" Otto have come true. Marketing himself as a "seer," Nostroydamus has made a fortune among the more gullible members of MNL. The rest of us see through his bullshit and obvious guesses that happen to
Leaked: Machi’s Letter to Duck’s Management
Hello Busta Pooky really wants me to stay in tonight and watch movies with her I'm feeling really under the weather today. I've been sick all weekend, and I don't think I should chance it. We're gonna go on a romantic stroll and then enjoy a candlelit meal at House of Shame
Todd Tickles Top Titty Twine to Turn Tide Towards Triumph
The Seals dominated play against the cocky Whalers Monday night, but the game was never truly in their hands until GM and "second hottest Otto" Todd rallied his team with a beaut of a goal in the third period. Whoop started the game off a little slow, really not generating
Dave P Caught With Pants Down – Oh Wait, That’s Just His Shell
Nordiques Punching Bag Dave "VapeD" P made fans blush Monday night during what could reasonably be described as a "wardrobe malfunction." Dave began the night looking spiffy in his baby blue pants shell. However, Dave forgot to tighten his belt, and soon after puck drop his shell began to slip
Coan Drops Heavyweight Title to BluLine
Jeremy Coan returned to the locker room dejected last night after a series of blunders on the ice in the ring caused him to lose his title against the crowd favorite BluLine. Coan began the fight floating into the offensive zone making BluLine his bitch. Coan was dancing around BluLine, and
Golden Seals Declared Open Season: International Endangered Act Fails Under Chill Peso
Over this past weekend international leaders met with PETA organizers to stymie the hunt of rare international species. It was the first such international call that has effected nations hunting abilities abroad; including American hunters. An immediate cease and assist on their hunting of animals of all kinds has been
PSA: How to Run the Penalty Clock
Hi All. We have been having trouble with clock operators not knowing how to add penalties to the scoreboard. This quick half-baked tutorial will get you through 99% of all penalty clock situations. Don't judge, I write this shit instead of working Above is a low resolution photo of the scoreboard controller.
