Billed as the Game of the Year in MNL, the clash between the Nordiques and Maroons Monday night lived up to the billing. The game originally scheduled for 9pm was flexed by the Panty News Network to the 10pm premier spot to allow viewers in British Columbia a chance to watch the action. As expected, the game was a spirited affair with a first round bye in the playoffs in the balance. “I sincerely thought before the game that the winner of this tilt will be the odds on favorite to hoist the Keg this season” said Jeremy Cowboy Coan “and you could tell by the intensity by both teams”. The match was about as equal as any game ever played in the league. Both teams were backstopped by superb goaltending as neither club could muster a goal until the wanning moments of the game. Nordique goalie Marl Pangrazzi thwarted away all 24 shots he faced, none as important than those in the dying seconds. Not to be outdueled, counterpart Cam Clauser stood tall all night at times making acrobatic saves to keep the Maroons in the fight. Both clubs exchanged quality scoring chances amongst the stingy defensive play. “At times both teams were able to sustain time in the others zone” said Adam Soukas “It was a fun game to play in”. 

The winner of the game would earn an important first round bye and both teams new the gravity of the situation. Skaters from both teams knew what was at stake and the winner would find a much easier path to Keg glory. As a result there was a carnival like atmosphere in the arena. Intense battles ensued all over the ice surface. Every loose puck was passionately fought for. Every shot on net was a battle. The ferocity of play reached critical mass midway through the game as Maroon head goon David Judge viscously forechecked 2022 Erik Karlsson Defenseman of the Year winner Matt Lepoudre. The two men violently crashed into the boards leaving Lepoudre dazed and confused. “It’s not my fault that I am bigger and stronger than Poo Bear” pleaded Judge. The egregious foul would send the defenseman to the sin bin for 2 and 10 with the 2 minute minor being served by stud sub Gumma. “Listen, I agreed to play for Pearcy. I meant play… not serve penalties like some scrub”. Shaken up on the play was Lepoudre who was diagnosed by Woodsie from the Maroon bench. “He is definately concussed” said Dr Wood. “If I know anything, its about head injuries… and he is obviously not fit to play”. It would later be disclosed by Nordique management that he is suffering from an upper body injury. Alas, the electric pink and black could not beat Clawz on the power play. In the third stanza, Act II of the Judge drama would play out with another malicious take down of DaveP. Battling in the corner Judge took liberties with the diminutive DaveP flattening him with a devastating hip check. “I thinked eye got hit by a train” said Vape nursing a bad knee as a result of the malevolent attack. “He never even touched Dave” commented Alex Kruso. “If the first penalty had never happened then he wouldn’t of even got a penalty on that play. Those dirtbag refs cost us this game!”.

Late in the game with the Maroons pressing to score the critical goal the puck was picked up by pure goal scorer Paul Antioch in the high slot. Antioch surveyed his options and let a crisp snap shop fly beating Clawz low and to the stick side through a maze of legs. The capacity crowd went wild as the beloved Nordiques took the lead. Knowing that the Maroons had to win in regulation time and with only two and a half minutes to play, GM DougE Fresh employed a unique strategy. Doing his best Chris Webber imitation, DougE Fresh called for a time out! A TIME OUT! Never in the history of MNL has there been such bold tactic. The energy and vitriol that emanated from the throngs of spectators was palpable. “What is he doing?’ exclaimed Brian Bustamante from the side boards. “There’s no timeouts or crying in hockey” joked Cipps from the bleachers. “You guys know that tomorrow I’m gonna get my butthole licked” shouted Dylan Loosey Goosey Lesner. The time out request was quickly dismissed by the official and play had to resume without delay. As fiercely as they could the Maroons lifted the goalie for an extra attacker in the dying moments. Sugar, Bin, Judge, Shep and the like could not get a puck passed Pangrazzi and the highly entertaining game would end 1-0. The loss spells third place for the Maroons and a show down with the Tigers in the first round of the playoffs.