Today will be a day that will go down in the MNL history books. A seismic shift is happening that will alter the destiny of three MNL franchises. Lifelong alliances, friendships and even bloodlines have been severed and has left the league in total chaos! What has emerged is the re-structuring of GM’s for nearly half of the league. Through a reliable source… the Nordiques will announce a new partnership between Jeremy Panty Dropper Drager and Paulie Antioch. It has been long rumored that the formation of “PANTIOCH” was inevitable, but to see it come to fruition is incredible. The jettison of league good guy Cowboy Coan allows him to become a free agent next season and open to the highest bidder. Next, the North Stars will announce that Troy Sniper Otto has looked to strengthen his empire by accruing mastermind Busta Bustamante to right the green and white ship. Lastly, Tyrone Otto has escaped the evil clutches of his overbearing brother and will join forces with Crunk to lead the Americans. Only one manager had the courage to speak to Dickie. A tearful Tye released the following statement on his Only Fans account… “Although it pains me to leave my brother and the North Stars organization, I had to do this for my health. My ear doctor told me I would lose my hearing by the age of 50 if I continue to listen to loud sounds”.  The off season is usually a time for courting new relationships and attracting star players to teams, but this realignment of team managers is unprecedented. Whaler GM Dylan Loosey Goosey Lesner intimated that “this is just another tactic Troy is using to redirect the focus on him instead of us winning the Keg”. Dave P reacted to the news via his Twitch account…”Aw geez! Nows I gots a 3 in 7 chance to have ta play fur a Otto next seasoning, Fack!” The redistribution of power throughout the league has been certified by the Ivory Tower according to sources.

Dickie Dunn