ALL RIIIIISEEE for the honorable, Judge Whoop

Seals 4, Whalers 0

Seals sentence Whalers to consolation match-up vs Diques

The Whalers went to court last night on accusations of human pony rides and 1st degree assault and slashing. The Whalers hired lawyer Troy Otto to help them out with the their offense but they needed a better defense to win this case. The hearing took over 15 minutes before the Seals Jury decided to make their opinions known. The first period was fought hard but mostly controlled by Troy and the Whalers.

Second period came and Troy made a costly mistake giving ShaunE some opportunities that eventually opened up the gateway that propelled the Jury to make their final decisions. Troy did his best but he could not seem to find a solution to help Trent and the Whalers out. Kimmel was almost non existent in the trial, he was caught googly-eying some blonde in the stands for most of the games. He even wanted to show off so much that he selfishly shot the puck on a two-on-one with Trent streaking down the opposite side. Trying to score goal now so he could score a goal later, it didn’t pan out and Trent started to feel his season slipping away.

The third period came around and the Seals continued to stay strong. The Jury of seals were not having anything the Whale Tails were throwing at them. The Whalers came in as the favorites in this case but made some crucial mistakes and the Foreman, Darren Cunningham spoke on behalf of the Jury. He ended up scoring twice more before Qtip SEALed the deal with an empty netter. Judge Whoop laid the hammer down on the Whalers and sentence them to the consolation match against the Nordiques decided their fate for a potential last place finish.

The Seals go in next week as heavy underdogs vs the prestigious North Stars. Look for this to be a great series with the Seals being “the only team fit to beat the North Stars”. Tye Otto making his predictions early last night that each of the two games in the series will be 3-0 in favor of the North stars in the first period. The seals look to take the odds on that prediction and give the North Stars and run for their money.

From the construction site of where Whoop crashed into the boards at Viking Arena, Senor Super Senior Reporter, Bartolo Guiermo Oliverio Sal Cordero Boostámenté