Bin Records His First Assist In MNL

Ducks 2(SO) – Diques 1

The Diques may have lost the war but Bin won the battle. Slack was buzzing all week with players taking digs at league favorite, Bin diesel about his ability to score but not pass. GM of the ducks, Busta, told reporters in a pre-game interview “Bin is great and all but the guy is just so selfish. DaveP has money on the line about points and the only time he records one is when Bin steals the puck from him and scores. Give the little guy a chance to make a play…….” he then whispered to me off the record “He wont actually make the play”. Other league members spoke out about Bins style of play.

“It is cute that Bin thinks he can beat my scoring record, and even if he does, we all know my point record will never be touched” – Proctor

“I am all about sharing, I love [giving] to anyone, I even gave Chad my pants last year to try and mend things with him and Troy. He loved my gift so much that he still wears them today. I may have stole his pants but i just wanted less weight to make me more aerodynamic. There is no reason a guy like Bin can’t be as big of a giver as me” – Tye Otto

“Bin is a great teammate, that is why I picked him with my first pick. He has the ability to be better than proctor and he is just entering his prime. If he wants to get more assists, then he just needs to give Panty a chance….. Panty clap BOMB baby (shows off his slap shot form)!” – Jeremy Drager

So is Bin to blame? Can the other Diques put the puck in the net or is Bin just a puck hog and obsessed with winning enough to where he refuses to pass to his sorry ass teammates? Sources close to Bin say that he is the most loving, caring father, and friend to them. He even has a son who loves soccer. “like father, like son” Bin stated early in the week while sharing a picture of his son. He scored 2 goals on his own. Sounds a lot like his father in the fact that he didn’t pass the ball. When asked what kind of ship he is running at the bin household, Bin responded with “I run a ship of champions, and there is no one better to lead teams than a Biliti”.

Back to Monday night at about 10:15pm, daveP got kicked off of Bin’s line for Gio. DaveP lined up for the faceoff after the ducks score on a new line, “what? Did Bin kick DP off his line for Gio who actually scores goals ?” Busta asked Cowboy Coan. Coan Responded with “Yeah he told DP to sit down and shut up, you useless son of a bitch, I try my ass off to make this team great again and you go out there and do nuffing? You’re done, play with Hal and Coan, I don’t want to see or hear you when I am on the ice.” He then apparently looked dead in daveP’s eyes and said “look at me, I am the captain now”. DaveP jokely replyed with “Yeah, yu do tri yer ass off, so much so dat yew dont even have an assessess this season!”.

Dave’s shift ended and Bin goes out on the ice for his first shift with Gio. Bin sends a nice Italian SAUCEage pass over to Gio who gobbles it up and spits out an absolute snipe of a goal. It may have been one of the best shots in MNL and it originated from Bin’s first ASS of the season. Bin was so happy, he took off his ass-less chaps and draped them over his GM’s head and said, “Thanks for believing in me coach, we will call you ass-less chaps dropper now, it doesnt sound as good but I dropped them for you bud”. Bin recorded  his first ASSist of the season and looks to take that confidence into the next game against the Seals. Tye was quoted after watching Bin get his first assist and stated, “I am a fan of asses but even I didnt enjoy seeing Bin in ass-less chaps, Gross!”

Ducks Jr Señor Beat Reporter Jaun Pablo Garcia Hernandez Boostúhmenté